Russian Dude Trademarks the Goatee

Facial Hair Types

Facial Hair Types

I’ve only known a few Russian dudes in my day, but they’ve all seemed tough as nails. It’s not anything in particular; it’s just a vibe that the Ruskies give off.

Have you seen Putin?! Dude seems hardcore. I don’t want to piss any Russians off.

But I’m rocking a goatee, and that’s in direct conflict with the trademark law handed down by a Russian blogger. Not cool.

(I guess Russian bloggers practice trademark law now? Who knew?)

Ain’t that some shiznat?! The dude claims a trademark on the goatee. I like your style Ruskie. I like your style.

I’m planning to trademark the boxer brief. I wear them everyday. Been doing it for years. No boxers. No tightie whities.

Seems like I should be gettin’ some royalties from all you copycats. Just send along some dinero, and we’re good.

Here’s the catch. I was planning to shave the goatee, but last night I trimmed it just right. Now I’m digging it. Y’all know I love some facial hair. What’s a dude to do?

I think I’m going to wait for the cease and desist order…or until I have a Russian knocking on my door.

Although, this gives Mrs. Dude a good reason to shave it…hopefully she doesn’t team up with the Russians. I guess I’ll have to sleep with one eye open for multiple reasons.